God my provider…

I have been having a really hard time at work due to human beings and the fact that I have been ill for a while. When it seems like I am getting better, I get completely floored – I am talking, lying down in buckets of sweat, unable to stand rolling in coughing fits which become throwing up because of the coughing – HOT MESS!

…and so I have been really struggling. I work with this lovely God-sent Pastor (who is another gift) but due to the new scheduling and time table, I have not seen him in weeks. What usually happens, is, even when things are bad, there was always the opportunity to touch base. He shares a random (very insightful) revelation that is always what I need to hear and that had been like fuel for me to “keep on keeping on”.

When you have all the worries and problems and no touch base, it builds up. It felt like the negativity was amped and I was drowning. I did not want to go to work any more and was ready to start looking elsewhere (the last time I checked, God said wait). I was tired, sick and frustrated. Then the person who brought encouragement, I did not see for a while.

This is the thing I tend to find. God answers the prayers we think but do not utter. What I was praying was, “take me out of here“. What I was thinking was, “I need help“. So far in my relatively short full time working career, I have always had some kind of support group. In my previous project, I found solace with these two other ladies. We would meet, banter, crack jokes and actually worship (really loudly) and pray. In this project, it was this Pastor…until the new schedule.

I am telling you, never ever underestimate the power of fellowship. There is an empowerment that happens when believers gather to do whatever, whether that is talk about god, pray to god or even sing to/in worship to God. We get empowered, encouraged, filled up to go out and live in this world. (Life is HARD. The fuel we get when we meet with our brothers and sisters enables us face the world with hope and courage…but that is another blog post!). In the time, I did not get to meet with or speak to my colleague, I felt it and I missed him terribly but I still had to come to work and give it my best. I needed help. I REALLY needed all the help I could get.

Walking into work today, I aid my usual prayer, “Lord, I need Your grace, mercy and favour today. Help me. Please help me. I speak life into today. In Jesus name, Amen” and I kept walking. Little did I know what God planned for me.

When I was told about this guy who would be great for us, (I recruit agency staff for our schools) I rolled my eyes. That is what this woman always says. Lol. This site was desperate for people, so before I read anything about him, I asked her to send him because another member of staff recommended him. Since the moment he started, all I have heard about him were good things. Everyone was raving about him. I was pleased. It would remove pressure from all the other staff as the site was severely short staffed.

Upon meeting him today, I thought, yes. Cool. Level headed, seems to fit in, we will keep him. Lunch needed to be picked up, we could not leave the company card with him so I decided to go on the errand with him. As per how God created me, I started my first round of questioning. He happily answered every one and told me about his very Christian dissertation. I wondered. could he be Christian?? If yes, how Christian was he? So I kept probing…

As it turns out, he is a born again, Spirit filled, youth pastor. I was delirious in my mind with joy. He was telling me about a Church near my church he used to go to or something like that. It was the kind of Church where, it would be very hard to be something other than ‘Christian Christian‘ (lol). Help had come. He explained that he was needing direction as he did not know what steps to take (or whether or not to remain with us or find something else). I suggested we pray (also my way of testing the waters – lol). He bowed his head and I thought, OKAY! I prayed for him and then he started praying for me and then started praying for the school – taking authority and speaking over the school. I was ecstatic. ECSTATIC!

I literally ran into the school to find the other guy and excitedly told him, we have another on the team. Lol! He said, “I know“. His reaction was one of puzzlement because I was behaving as if I had won the lottery and I was telling him that another member of staff was saved. Lol!

This is the thing with answered prayers. Especially prayers like mine that I thought but did not utter. When it is answered, it DOES FEEL LIKE I HAD WON THE LOTTERY. I needed help. I needed (I am still unsure of what) and God, in His infinite kindness, sent help.

I think of the following verse…

Don’t be like them, for your Father knows exactly what you need even before you ask him!Matthew 6:8 NLT

It is so true. This happens to me so many times. Things I think and want to pray for but I feel like, god is not interested in that small thing. Or I think it is too minuscule to disturb God with. Or even, that I am not worthy of it so I never actually present it before God. Then God answers any way and I can’t help but feel unworthy. To be loved so much that He hears even my un-uttered prayers. What a good God we serve. Such a kind and loving Father!

This is the God we serve.

For the people who will walk away thinking my excitement is because he may be a potential bae – he is not. He is really young. It is not like that. My happiness is, there is another who is a source of encouragement. Another voice to join with, agree with in respect of lifting up our staff and colleagues. Another voice that represents our King. Another person who can tell and or share the story of salvation. Who can share God’s love and mercy without it always being the kooky Nigerians – (yh, he is English).

He represents God sending help. I dare not hope that he can sing…because if he can, GAME OVER! (heehhee).

I wanted to share this because I want to remind you that…

God is able.

God hears.

God sees.

God cares.

…about EVERYTHING concerning you.

Nothing is too big or small where you are concerned. This was my major take-away and I am so blessed. I feel so privileged to be called a child of God.

Trusting Him is the smart way to go because He really does love us all.

Cor, I am so happy and thankful!

God has been and still is my Provider.

Regarding that niggling worry, you have, TRUST!

Won’t He do it?! Wooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!

Love and Blessings,

xOx

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